I feel the world has fallen around me. Not in the physical, but the supernatural, having smarts is not all that it's cracked up to be. Nearly everyday now i receive more and more dreams that do concern me going on a roadtrip...but this roadtrip is different from the one i have planned in two years. Everywhere i look now there is not a place i have not visited in my dreams. It is very saddening and disturbing. I think i might be going crazy. The maddness in my mind is like a swirling vortex that is sucking me deeper and deeper into the supernatural realm. not a day goes by now that i find mysef talking to the plants and the animals. The tree in our backyard i go to so often now to vent it's not even funny. It seems that no, instead of my friends leaving me..i'm leaving them. it just seems sometimes that nature seems to respond better than any other human. i think i know what it is though....it's kristine. I can't stop thinking about her. i am incapable of loving another person the way i do her. I i did not have a family here that needed tending to i would cram a sack full of clothes, sling it on my back, and hit the road that leads to Kansas City. I fear going to sleep now, for everytime i do another dream is there in my mind to await me. if only i could do what i could when i was younger and make myself wake up. I realize though that i must look to God for help...Lord God....help me...i beg of you. stretch out your hand and help me onto my feet....i need you know moe than ever.

WARNING!

This is a warning...if you do not want to look even deeper into my mind...DO NOT READ!! I do not want to waste paper on my thoughts and feelings...it's useless wasting paper for such a thing. Thanks.